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Kind or Snow

Mr. Brown’s Precept from the book Wonder, by R. J. Palacio, holds new meaning to me today. We’ve been reading the book in class for a couple weeks now. My son and I are also reading it at home.

If given the choice between being right and being kind; Choose Kind.

This morning I had choices.

1. “choose kind,” and politely address a mother of a boy, so-and-so, whom most definitely did not “choose kind,” in regards to actions and comments targeted at my son these past few weeks.

2. I could have been, “right,” and hurled icy snowballs, pelting them both in their unsuspecting faces as they defenselessly made their way into the school this morning.

3. I could have stayed silent. Crickets humming, (blaring) as I smiled courteously, (sheepishly)  ..Oh Good Morning.. and nodded as I saw the young culprit and his mother make their way into the school.

I had influences.

  1. My son’s heart; pure gold.  He doesn’t have a mean bone. I would ask him to stick up for himself and he would say he was but, “didn’t want to hurt so-and-so’s feeling, too.” Gaaaahh. I mean. Come on. Sometimes having the nice kid is tough.
  2. My friend’s advice; We are our kids’ biggest advocates. Mom-to-Mom meeting, Stat.


 I had… divine intervention? At 7:30 A.M. the mother walks up to school with her son at the exact moment I am dropping off mine, as if I had willed it to happen.

Here we go…

I chose?  Option # 1.

I chose kind.

Politely, I inform her of some recent instances where some not-so-kind-choosing-and-doings were taking place which involved her son. That’s hard to hear. I knew that as hard as it was for me to address it with her, it had to be hard to receive, as well. This could have gone badly. Regardless of the risks, I decided to choose kind and address the issue directly, but gently and let the chips fall where they may. The mother was reassuring and apologetic. I breathed a sigh of relief. Thank you kindness.  

I’m not going to lie. It might have felt pretty gratifying to pelt snowballs this morning. I’m 34 and this thought ran through my head. No shame. With the frustration I felt and protective nature setting in, Mama Bear was coming out and ready to pounce. Ok, maybe it wouldn’t have been right but it would have felt right at that moment. Again, no shame in that feeling.

Regardless of this, sound the trumpets, I chose kind. Mama Bear politely roared; hopefully loud enough to get the message across. Now. Ahem. This, mind you, is all with the hopes that some reciprocal action will be taking place with little, “so-and-so,” choosing kindness Option # 1, too.

Otherwise, I may be apprehended for snowball assault. 





Categories: Uncategorized


11 replies

  1. Welcome!!
    Loved this piece for its message and its writing quality 🙂 I LOVED Wonder!!! and I agree with you. Kind it best but hard. Yes, I have snow pelting fantasies too but I keep remembering how much more you get from KIND or at least diplomatic honesty!

  2. Oh, throw those snowballs girl! Your ending is perfection. I’d bail you out, no worries. 🙂 Choose kind. It is hard and your piece conveys that so nicely.

  3. I can’t wait to hop back into this book with you guys tomorrow! I’m behind but choosing kind has been in the forefront of my thinking since the beginning with this. You did your son a solid this morning. It will get better. You are his biggest fan and his great confidant. He wouldn’t have told you if he didn’t need your help… I do vow to be look out for Operation Mama Bear should it come to that.

  4. Looks like a must read for me. Option 1 is a good place to start, I think we all could agree on the other two options also.

  5. I just loved the way you chose the core premise of Palacio’s book and used it to shape how you walked through your morning. Kudos to you for choosing kind.

    BTW: As you may’ve noticed, I’m featuring a different Slicer’s slice of life story each day during this month. May I feature this one? If so, please email me at stacey{at}staceyshubitz{dot}com. Thanks!

  6. I like how you speak to your reader and you let them know that you had three options and of course you choose kind! but I like how you went into a little more detail about the other options. I’ve been stuck on island crabby so I feel that I could have gone with option 2, chuckle chuckle.

  7. After a tough day, I appreciate your candid and the hard-earned lesson sharing. Thank you for taking the time to post on this difficult topic.

  8. I like your way with words. Your post is honest, thought provoking and entertaining at the same time. It is impossible to read all the posts, so I am glad Stacey shared yours.

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